Prove me Wrong

I despise.

You scan her I saw. I can’t make you see me, can’t make you want me, won’t take my clothes off to make you proud, won’t move my hips so you’ll whistle with crowds.

Sorry not sorry, not sorry not sorry.

My power is my words! My power is in my thoughts! My power is in the way you were welcome to lean lean lean lean lean lean on me!

You’ll be a stupid OLD man WITH her ALL ALONE 
A double-jointed situation Flexible Strength gone

Secrets of the bedroom. Did you forget secrets were possible? No one knows. I’m not the hook on your arm. I’m not the candy piece you can strut down the carpet. I’m not any of that! I am more so much more. I’m so much more!

You’ll be a stupid OLD man WITH her ALL ALONE. 
A double-jointed situation Flexible Strength gone 

I am the one who would take in your pain as my own. I would have done that for you!  I wanted too! Stupid man! She caressed her neck. You got carried away. I finally learned that temptation will never go away. It is the phantom. We are the ones who must watch it float from view. A thought can come a thought can go but you grabbed on you took hold. Stupid man!  Flash goodbye. I keep going but you lost. You lost. You did.

A castle of lies.  The cracks, the crevices. I always want to know are they happy when they get what they want. They never did it right. I used to believe everyone was like me.  I know that was naive.  I know  I know. SO naive. Imperfect but honest. Not like me no.  LIARS! I HATE YOU ALL!

She whisked you a way. I do mind. Okay I mind. Okay. Okay. I mind!

You’ll be a stupid OLD man WITH her ALL ALONE
A double-jointed situation Flexible Strength gone

You are ridiculous. You looked at her hips. You saw her stomach you grabbed her waist. I hate you because you lost what could have been. I hate you because I lost you. I hate you because I don’t believe anymore.

My faith in family is gone. My faith in family is gone. I know I should never have put that faith in you.  THATS NOT FAIR! I HATE THIS WORLD! I’M READY TO GO! NO THATS NOT TRUE! I hate the ending. I hate that all that starts always ends.

You’ll be a stupid OLD man WITH her ALL ALONE. 
A double-jointed situation Flexible Strength gone. 

I hate you because you didn’t value what I could do.  I haven’t lost my worth. I know it is here but I wish the stupidity of men could not be felt so clear. I hate you! I hate you I hate you because  I loved you and you took it all away. You chose one moment over a year. Infatuation over love. I‘ve given up on love. They say temptation is and will always be.  I finally understand.  I get it. When I see and feel something for him I’ll remind myself of you. I won’t be captured. Don’t hunt me. Don’t.

I won’t think of him I wont want him I won’t wish for his heart. I’ll remember he could want me but he’ll leave me for the lust. I remember wailing in the night. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t speak. I was weak. I was in pain. My chest beat hard.  My heart, cracked. It did, I felt it.

She said just take their bodies. She said that’s what I do. But she doesn’t get me. If I touch him. If my hands brush against his body I’ll fall. I’ll love him. I’ll want to give him all of me because sex is two spirits that meet. Peace out desire. Temptation floats. I hate him! I hate you more because had you not ever been he could have been my shore  my place my home. I hate you!

Men cheat men lie men stare men whine men cry men pout men blame men spit men shout men tell you what you need to know but can lock lies for decades.

Prove me wrong

Prove me wrong

I wish he would

I want him too

I wish he could

I want to be wrong about him

I’m not

I hate you..

I’ll never let him in

I promised myself I’d never do this again.

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